Hello and Welcome!

Hello all, and welcome to blog numero dos!  (If you haven't checked out blog numero uno yet, please do so at pinkcupcakeweddings.blogspot.com!)  The main reason I decided to start this sucker is because I am back on the diet wagon, once again.  This time I have the mother load of all motivation:  my wedding (and subsequent honeymoon in Maui) to get in shape for.  However, just because I have the motivation does not make all this any easier.  In fact, sometimes the pressure of the countdown makes the whole situation harder.  Basically, I need somewhere to vent because, let's be honest, as amazing as any fiance can be (and mine is pretty freakin awesome) complaining to your guy about weight loss is about as fun as a trip to the gyno (and almost as helpful).

So, some background on me and my body image issues.  I have been struggling with my weight for what seems like forever, but what has really been about ten years.  I was always very active in my youth/young teen years so my horrible (seriously, awful) eating habits didn't make too much of a difference as far as my weight is concerned (God only knows what my arteries look like).  However, when I quit cheerleading my junior year of high school and stopped all physical activity along with it, I started to see the pounds flock to my tummy, hips and thighs.  Now, I have never been a "skinny" girl.  I gots me some curves, and honestly, I prefer it that way.  But watching my clothes size slowly grow bigger and bigger over the years did not do a whole lot for my self esteem (which in turn led to lots of other bad decisions, but we don't really need to go there).

My first successful weight loss journey was about six years ago when my family took a trip to Hawaii.  I knew that I was going to be living in a bathing suit for a week, and since Mom was on this trip, constantly photogrpahed in said suit.  That was great motivation to get my butt in gear.  I got a gym membership and started working out every day.  At the time, I was working at a breakfast restaurant, so I would eat a healthy meal there, come home, work out, eat another healthy meal and go to bed.  I set an unrealistic weight loss goal for my body type and when I couldn't meet that goal, I gave up.  By the time I was flying over the ocean, I had gained back five of the twenty-five pounds I had worked so hard to lose.

Needless to say, the rest of the twenty-five came back again.  And left again.  And came back again.  When I met my now fiance, I was approximately twenty-five pounds lighter than my current weight.  After much badgering, whining and complaining on my part, we got engaged in October of 2010 and set our wedding date for July of 2011.  I figured that would be all the motivation I would need to get back on the diet saddle.

Not so much.  I don't know why, but for some reason, the drive to start working out and eating better just wasn't there.  I bought a used treadmill, got it home, only to discover it didn't really work properly.  Used that as an excuse for months until I finally realized I am only five (now four and a half) months away from the most important (and photographed) day of my life.  More than anything, I never ever ever ever ever want to look at my wedding pictures and have a negative thought.  And if I stay the way I am now, I will.

So I bought a new treadmill, one that works properly, and have been using it every day (pretty much) for the past two and a half weeks.  As of my last weigh in (last Sunday) I have lost four pounds.  It's a great start, but I've got a long way to go.

I know that I am going to have to continue to make lifestyle changes in order for this process to be truly successful.  Because while the wedding might be the motivation, it is by no means the finish line.  I am getting married for gosh's sake, it's time to grow up, be an adult, and get my s*** together.  We'll see how that goes :o)

If you have made it this far, thanks for reading.  I hope you will continue to hang in there with me.  I'm going to need all the help I can get!